Another Friday looks me directly in the eyes with it's hypnotizing promise of fun, adventure and frolic for the weekend. With that kind of promise, who wouldn't rush to buy stock? So, as they say, I'm in.
I'm finding myself in less than my typical party mood for a Friday. I get email from reunion dot com and it seems today is the birthday of my first "real" love. The mention of this person that I haven't seen or thought much about for thirteen or so years has put me in a rather pensive mood.
It has me wondering if that particular love was so profound because I was young and not bittered by my experience or was it just great and I didn't know enough to know how great it was due to lack of experience. This is much too deep of a seed to plant in my pre-drunk mind. Will this thought manifest itself later tonight when I'm three sheets to the wind? Will it be ugly? Should I stay home and listen to some of the music that she and I used to enjoy together, have a good cry and wonder where it all went wrong? Hell no, I'm a man, diversion is the key to not having to confront such "chick-like" thoughts. Back to dwelling on the past for now. I used to get angry and jellous and yell and scream and carry on, that's what drove her away. I didn't stop to think how abusive that sort of behavior is and the damage it causes. That's how I was the majority of my twenties. I'm better now. I don't allow my buttons to be pushed. A lot of women consider me aloof because I don't often get visibly upset. I'll turn and leave. I'm not sure which they hate worse.
I guess passion and "spark" are as equally as dangerous as they are intoxicating. Sharon, if you're out there, happy birthday. I'll drink a toast in your honor and all the things that made us grin.
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